Corporal Punishment verses the Power of the Pregnant Pause

Corporal Punishment verses the Power of the Pregnant Pause

                As many people who attended schools in the early sixties, corporal punishment was part of our educational experience.  There were paddles with holes drilled into them to create blisters on our bottoms and samurai teachers swinging yardsticks.  Teachers often gave students a choice: “the paddle or a call to your mother.”  Most students were so terrified of the wrath of their parents that they gladly accepted the paddle.  Fortunately for me, my patens didn’t have a telephone.  Nevertheless, I learned my lesson in sixth grade about the short-comings of corporal punishment.

                In everyone’s sixth grade class there is one boy who is always in trouble.  Lowell was that boy in my class.  He spent much of his time wandering about the room pulling girl’s braids trying desperately to get their attention just like every other boy, but still Lowell was different.  He smelled like stale cigarettes. His clothing was dirty and in bad repair.  It was a poor neighborhood; most of the student wore patched hand-me-down clothing, but rumor had it that Lowell’s parents were alcoholics that frequently locked their children out of the house over night when they had parties.  

                On this particular day when a girl complained to Miss Peterson, our fresh-from-college first-year teacher, that Lowell had pulled her hair. Miss Peterson really lost it.  She was furious.  She demanded that Lowell bend over a desk and she wielded her yardstick like a mighty club.  Lowell received these humiliating beatings daily, but today was different.  She was the Samurai Warrior and Lowell was the nemesis.  She began hitting him harder and harder at first on the buttocks and then down his thighs, at least twenty or thirty hard blows.  Suddenly Lowell turned around, his face crimson with rage, snatched the yardstick from Miss Peterson’s hand and with one crack broke it in half.  Miss Peterson’s face was horrified and she stepped away.  Lowell tossed the broken yardstick aside and raised his hands above his head.  “I’m going to kill you!” he roared seething with anger. As Lowell stepped toward Miss Peterson, all of the boys in the classroom, leaped on him and tried to hold him back, but it was like holding back a run-away locomotive.  Lowell continued forward carrying them with him and Miss Peterson turned and ran from the room followed by Lowell with all of the boys still clinging to him.   In a few minutes, our principal, Mrs. MacDonald came into the classroom, quieted the frightened students, and took over for Miss Peterson.  Lowell and Miss Peterson had the rest of the day off. 

      When I became a teacher a decade later, corporal punishment was still being used in the classroom, but after that experience, I had no desire to use it.  Since I stood a whopping five foot one inch almost and ninety-five pounds, I knew the likelihood of me intimidating anyone was pretty small, so I had to find another way.  I really didn’t have to look any further than my parents.  My parents both had very different approaches to discipline.  My mother (another five foot monster) used corporal punishment.  She would slap you, break into tears and wail, “Wait until your father gets home.”  Since she was small, the slapping wasn’t much although we did feel badly for making her cry.  The real terror were her words, “Wait until your father gets home.”

                My father never spanked anyone.  He was the master of the pregnant pause, forcing you to wait and think about what you had done.  For example, on one particular day, I had attempted to kick my younger brother, Dave, in the chin for his verbal taunting.  Just as I was about to release my anger on him, he slammed the door to his bedroom and my foot penetrated his bedroom door.  I had to wait three hours for my dad to get home.   Petrified I began to create excuses for my behavior.  It was, after all, Dave’s fault because if he had not slammed that door, he would have been properly kicked in the chin and door would have suffered no damage. 

                When my father got home, I met him in the driveway filled with anxiety.  I tried to tell him what had happened and who was to blame, but he would not listen.  He told me to wait until after dinner.  My anxiety increased.  After dinner he told me to wait until he had had a shower and changed his clothing.  My anxiety increased even more.  After that I had to wait while he read the paper and had time to unwind from work.  I was near manic stage.  Finally he asked me to sit down at the kitchen table and wait while he fixed himself a cup of coffee, got me a glass of milk and put a dozen Oreo cookies on a plate.  I knew I couldn’t eat cookies or drink milk because my stomach was churning.  After a long slow sip of coffee, my father asked me to explain what I had done wrong that had upset my mother so much.  Like a machine gun, I rattled off all of the events of the day explaining how it was really my brother’s fault because if he hadn’t slammed that door nothing would have been broken except his chin.  “So, do think kicking your brother’s chin would have been better than kicking the door?”  He waited for my response and I realized the error in my judgment.  I had to admit it was not.  He sipped his coffee and nibbled on a cookie while I waited nervously.  “What could you have done differently?”  Even though I again insisted that if my brother hadn’t taunted me, this would never have happened, he would not accept it.  He shook his head and indicated that he was talking to me and not my brother.  After I had identified several alternative plans to dealing with a taunting brother, he pointed out there was still the matter of the broken door.  He explained to me that replacing that door would take money from the family’s recreation budget and since I was the one who broke it, he didn’t think it was fair for the entire family to suffer because of my lapse in judgment.  He again asked me to think of ways I could earn the money to replace the door forcing me to select chores I could do for neighbors to earn enough to replace the door.  As a result, I ended up gardening and mowing lawns all summer.  Even though I paid my father back for the broken door, he never replaced it until I moved away as reminder to me to not to lose my temper. 

                It is in the power of the pregnant pause (the waiting) that forces students to think about what they have done, take ownership for their poor choices, consider alternative behaviors and take responsibility for repairing the damage.  Some people call this “Think Time” and it helps students learn to be responsible.  Next time you send a student into the hall wait to talk him.  Let them simmer for a while.  It will give you time to regain your composure, so you can direct his/her understanding of his/her behavior in a calm, collected manner.  It allows the student to think about what he/she did wrong.  Although corporal punishment is rarely used in today world, we do have teachers who use verbal assaults and intimidation to control students.  These tactics do not teach students to take ownership for their behavior and learn other methods of problem solving or in Lowell’s case socialization.  Leave the yardstick in the classroom.  You don’t want to become Miss Peterson, instead use the power of the pregnant pause.

                   

Show A Little Kindness

Show A Little Kindness

                Creating a warm, caring environment helps students grow both emotionally and intellectually. A conscious effort by the instructor is the only way to achieve this.  How do you do this?  First, develop empathy; second, model formal manners; and third, create predictable procedures, but temper them with mercy.

                Remember what it feels like to be a fourteen-year-old teenager who is certain that the girl sitting next to you and who has never said more than three words to you is the love of your life.  Remember what if feels to be a seventh grade boy who is so worried about getting to class on time that you don’t see the door opening into the hallway and crash directly into it breaking your nose.  Remember being so preoccupied with what others might think that you couldn’t possibly go into the restroom and use a toilet during class change because other people will know that you have bodily functions. Remember when you were an eleven year old boy and believed belching the alphabet was the funniest and the greatest accomplishment of your life. Remember when you were a thirteen year old girl and you raised your hand four times to answer questions.  When the teacher finally called on you, it was the one and only question that you didn’t know.  You knew that teacher did this on purpose just to humiliate you.  It is easy to laugh at the serious tribulation of the average middle school student, but to these students these concerns are serious and at times overwhelming. As educators, we not only teach our subject’s curriculum, but help build the emotional and social well-being of the child.  To do that, the teacher needs to remember what if feels like to be a middle school student and communicate that empathy to them. 

                Modeling proper manners is a good way for an educator to teach a student how to show respect.  To be respected, one must earn respect.  Manners involves more than what you say to a student, because body language communicates so much more than words. For example, I have known educators whose body language and vocal tones tell students that they are “the scum of the earth.”  The students read this and reflect the attitude back to the instructor.  On the other hand, I have known teachers who refer to students as "Mr. Smith” or “Miss Martinez,” thank students for each appropriate gesture and give students compliments as they enter the classroom.  The students feel like millionaire guests at a luxury hotel.  They love to be pampered and respected, just like we all do. They sub-consciously begin to mirror the behavior and become more civilized.  The civility continues when a student is being corrected, “Mr. Brown, I am sorry, but you know you can’t have that cell phone out in class.  If you could please put it away, I would greatly appreciate it.  Thank you for complying with the rules.” (All of this, of course, is said with a smile on his face.)

                Finally students comply with rules if there are clear procedures in place and they are consistently reinforced.  The Conscious Classroom Management by Rick Smith is a good source for new teachers to develop creative, fun procedures that are easily established. (If you are an administrator, either send your teachers to one of Rick Smith’s workshops or invite him for the entire faculty.  He is amazing and very entertaining.)  I personally love his “Exit Procedure.”  If you have taught middle school or are about to teach it, you know or will learn that the last five minutes of class is not productive.  The students stop working, put everything away, wander about the room, so they can be the first to dash out of the door knocking desks, small students and teachers asunder.  To avoid this, Rick Smith suggests that you have an “Exit Procedure” that is posted on the wall with a rubric of readiness.  Mine was:  first, butts in seats, second, feet on floor; third, facing front; fourth, hands on desk; and fifth, smiling.  (Smiling was added by a student, because he said it was his favorite class and it felt more like a game.  Since people are always happy when they play games, we should smile.) I hold up my fingers to indicate if they are ready to leave.  One finger means total mayhem and five fingers means ready to go.  The great thing about this procedure is as a teacher, you don’t have to say anything.  The students will begin regulating the less manageable students.  They know that no one can leave (regardless of when the bell rings) until they reach a five and everyone is in proper exit procedure. 

                Although it is important to be consistent, sometimes all teachers have to “show a little kindness” and bend the rules.  If you have a student who is struggling because of a difficult situation, you may need to stretch the rules a little.  For example, I once had a student whose parents were going through a custody battle and when he spent time with his father he was absent often and did not complete his assigned work; as a result, he failed my class.  When I learned about the situation,  the young man  and I sat and discussed this.  I began by showing empathy for his situation.  Then, I emphasized the importance of taking control of one’s life even when “bad things happen that are beyond our control.”  Finally I offered him a contractual agreement to rectify the situation.  He had to earn a minimum of a “C” and I would change his grade for the previous quarter to a “D-“; thus avoiding summer school.  He earned an “A” the next quarter.  It doesn’t matter the details of the agreement. The students learns how to pick himself  up and get back in the race, an important life skill. Often students are in a stressful situation and they need a little kindness to be successful.  

Combating the Classroom Terrorist

Combating the Classroom Terrorist

                For those of us in the teaching profession, we have all heard stories about that student in the faculty room for at least two years before he is assigned to our class.  These stories are so gruesome that we visit the counseling office to beg the head-counselor to send him to the old, veteran teacher who might chew him up and spit him out before breakfast.  Every assistant principal, not only knows him by name, but has kept a detailed account of each interaction because he is one of the frequent flyers that they each hope one day to begin expulsion procedures.  The school resource officer has not only heard of him, but knows him on a first name basis.   In fact, he has made him his “special project.”  He is classroom terrorist, the student that all teachers fear.   Some of these terrorist have created serious havoc.  I had one who held a knife to my throat, one who hit me over the head with a 1000-page literature textbook, and another who punched me.  I have seen others light a teacher on fire, bite a teacher and I have heard of one who raped and murdered another student who was heading to the rest room, but most of these terrorist are more like Bart Simpson and only want to disrupt the orderly process of education in one creative form of  tomfoolery or another. This is the student who put a dead mouse in my teacher's desk or took all of the drawers from that desk and put them back upside down, so when I opened my desk drawers, everything fell on the floor to the amusement of all of the other students.  This is the class comedian. 

                How should a teacher combat the classroom terrorist?  First, understand why he has chosen to become a classroom terrorist.  Students often choose to behave this way for three reasons: first, the child needs his parents’ attention; second, the child lacks self-confidence or academic skills and has decided if he can’t be the best of the best, he will become the worst of the worst; and third, the child is psychologically or emotionally disturbed.  As a teacher, you can’t do anything about the third cause except notify the school psychologist and hope he/she will be able to get the child the professional help he needs, focus on the first two and hope one of them is the reason for his disturbance.

                If the child is acting out to get his parents’ attention, the teacher can usually discover this by calling his parent to a meeting..  If the parents are not available by phone, email or in person that could be an indication.  The other type of parent will be more than happy to answer the teacher’s phone call and expect her to stay on the phone for thirty minutes to an hour long after contract time so they can berate the teacher for every problem in which the child has ever become involved, decrying that this teacher is the culprit who is responsible for everything and anything that child has ever done or been a party to. You can guess that this teacher will be waiting with baited-breath for the face-to-face meeting with this parent.  Be sure to invite an administrator to witness the bedlam so he/she can add more interesting facts to the file he/she is collecting.  Maybe you’ll get lucky and this will be the tidbit he/she needs to make that expulsion a reality.  Dreams do come true.  The good news is you don’t need to take his behavior or the parents’ rage personally.  Just note that the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree.  If on the other hand, the parents act frustrated and confused, you know he isn’t acting that way to get their attention.

                If the student is acting out because he lacks good self-esteem or academic skills, these are both easily resolved.  First, move a desk close to the teacher’s desk, facing the teacher.  When your little terrorist begins to act out, simply move him to that desk and tell him he “needs positive-time with the teacher.” This will give you time to show him how to do the assignment while the other students believe he is being punished.   He does not want to lose face for lacking skills and he won't, because he still looks like The Billy the Kid, the image he desires.  It is a win-win situation.  Second, sometimes a silly technique works with these students.  Another teacher shared with me that when a particularly difficult student became restless, he would say, “Frozen Man.”  The student had to freeze in whatever position he was in for a given amount of time.  When the teacher allowed him to “thaw,” he was ready to join the class and the disruption was over.  Third, I have used rewards, I begin small: if the student behaves himself for one class period, he earns a piece of candy.  After a week, I extend it to an entire week to earn a larger prize, a candy bar.  If you are working in teams, you can have the principal call him down if he has behaves himself in all of his classes for a week to receive his candy bar.  Other teachers use cards: a green card means the student's behavior is appropriate, a red card means it is inappropriate.  Some students need to learn what is appropriate and what is not appropriate.  Fourth, social interaction with the teacher also serves as a reward.  Take the student out into the hall when the class is engaged in an independent activity and either praise him for appropriate behavior or correct him for inappropriate behavior.  After a week if he has behaved appropriately, write a positive note and mail it to his parents.  They will probably appreciate it, because this may be the first time they have every received praise about their child.  Fifth, often times these terrorist are suffering from emotional trauma at home like divorce, a death in the family or abuse.  Talking to the parent, a counselor or even the child himself can give you some insight.  When students feels they have an adult to talk to or someone who is willing to understand their situation, they behave better in school.

                What you don’t want to do with a classroom terrorist is become angry or fearful around him.  He is the master of manipulation who wants to run your classroom.  If he sees any signs of weakness, he will go for the jugular, because he is an Alpha Dog.   At all times remain calm, but assertive.  If you lose your temper, he will discover the buttons to keep you angry just for his amusement.  Don’t ever allow that.  Fighting with this type of student is like wrestling with a pig.  You both get dirty and the pig loves it.   To combat the classroom terrorist, you must maintain the master of your domain. 

The Alpha Teacher:

The Alpha Teacher

                If you’re my contemporary you will recall Cheech and Chong’s hilarious rendition of Sister Mary Elephant.  When the routine begins with the familiar sound of pandemonium in a classroom, a cacophony of student voices and small almost inaudible whisper of a female teacher saying, “Class” with absolutely no effect on the chattering students.  The frustrated teacher repeats her whisper slightly louder, “class” with still no decipherable effect.  Finally the teacher screeches, “Class” at an ear-splitting volume and the student fall silent.  The teacher timidly whispers, “Thank you.”  This routine is funny to most of us because we have all experienced these ineffective teachers.  Unfortunately, those same techniques are still being employed.  To earn the students’ respect a teacher must become the Alpha Dog by: first, behaving in a self-confident manner; second, creating a positive relationship with your students; and third, developing a routine or a structure in your classroom where students know what to expect.  Becoming the Big Dog, the Alpha Dog, will make your career easier and more enjoyable for everyone.

                The Dog Whisperer has effectively described how to be the pack leader which is exactly what a teacher must be to be effective.  If the teacher demonstrates signs of passive behavior like Sister Mary Elephant, the students will ignore her.  If the teacher becomes aggressive snapping, growling barking at students, the students will manipulate her to continually snap, bark and growl because everyone loves a good show.  If the teacher decides to be “their buddy,” a new leader will emerge and it won’t be the teacher.  How does a teacher emerge as the “top dog,” the Alpha in a pack of whining students?  Watch The Dog Whisperer and notice what he suggests about carrying yourself upright and know when to look at students.  Develop a “teacher look” by keeping a serious or stern face why you make direct eye contact with a student.  Proximity is another powerful tool.  Arrange your desks so you have access to all of your students.  When a student needs “extra attention” move close to his desk, kneel down, moving your face directly into his and using a whisper explain what he is doing wrong, and redirect him.  Sometimes it only takes a question:  "What should you be doing right now?"  Maybe he has no clue.  Finally, call in the infantry, invite “Bart Simpson” to the teacher's desk, ask him to call his mother and explain to her what he was doing in your class.  When he is finished, take the phone and thank her for her help in solving this issue.  The rest of the class has just witnessed the teacher's power and are shaking in their proverbial boots hoping they don’t have to do it.  The word will be out. “Don’t mess with Mrs. Jenkins.  She will make you call your mother.”  If this doesn’t straighten out Bart, it is bound to prevent some potential problems down the road. 

                Next, to be the Alpha Dog, the teacher has to be the dog responsible for the happiness of the pack.  Stand in the hall between classes, greet each student  using his/her name, compliment him/her, and chat with him/her about his/her outside life.  This is the time to strengthen positive relationships with your students.  If a student feels that the teacher likes him and care about him, he is less likely to misbehave in the classroom.

                The most important time in your class is the first two minutes.  Establish a routine or a starter, so all students know what to expect each day.  Just like walking a dog every day creates a pattern that the dog enjoys and appreciates, the teacher needs to create a similar structure with her students.  Don’t get the leashes out yet, but it is the same idea.  When I was in 8^th grade, Mr. Limb, our science teacher, walked into the room directly after the bell rang and slapped a yardstick on the desk.  Although we knew it happened every day, we jumped to attention and the chatter stopped.  That particular starter never worked for me.  First, all of my desks are filled with students and the thought of inadvertently hitting one terrified me.  Second, there seemed to be a shortage of yardsticks in my school.  Maybe lots of teachers tried Mr. Limb’s tactic and broke them. Instead, I purchased a small xylophone with three notes on it.  It sounded like the old NBC intro-music.  The notes are high and piercing.  Students covered their young ears, but don’t worry it never affected my old ears at all.  Then, I would say “It’s your favorite time of day, Silent Sustained Reading.  Get your books out and I’ll put ten minutes on the clock.”  I use an old oven clock to time them. Always start the class on a positive note and it will set the atmosphere for the rest of the period.  School should be something students look forward to just like the dog looks forward to his daily walk.  Within a month, students are asking if they can play the three notes on the xylophone, or put the ten minutes on the clock.  What is especially satisfying is that they all begin finishing my line in unison.  On days, we don’t get to have “Our favorite time of day,” they complain.  Routines are important.  How do you think the army turns restless, smart-mouthed teens into “a fighting-machine.”

                So don't be a teacher like Sister Mary Elephant who cannot control her class and don’t give them a writing assignment about why they should behave appropriately.  First, they are having too much fun destroying their teacher's mind and second, the English Department is trying to convince them that writing is fun.  Instead watch The Dog Whisperer  and learn how to be the Alpha-Teacher.